“Am I too much in my masculine energy?”

This is a question I hear a lot.

Let’s first clear this up, then I invite you to read the reflection questions to find clarity and bring greater harmony into your life.

The feminine and the masculine are energetic polarities that each represent opposing traits, values, and aliveliness. The masculine GO energy is penetrative, linear, organised and productive while the feminine FLOW energy is receptive, radiant, chaotic, connected and expressive. The masculine is consciousness. The feminine is physical manifest. The two polarities when properly balanced create tension, and in this tension we can find our ultimate potential

These energies exist in equal amounts in all of us, man and woman alike, and can be harnessed by you whenever and however you desire.

The masculine and feminine principle are not to be confused with gender or sex.

And it does not matter if you express one more than the other. If you are a woman you do not need to be in “your feminine” more than “your masculine”, and vice versa for a man. We all have our own personal energetic balance.

You are the unique expression of YOU.

The extent and the way we choose to embody and express either the feminine or the masculine energy is determined by your personality, your upbringing, the situation you find yourself in, behavioural patterning, who you are with, and your preference.

Ok. But Jess, why do you focus so much on the Feminine?

I’m glad you asked!

For millennia nearly the world-over the masculine energy has been prioritised while the feminine has been suppressed.

We are really, really good at harnessing our masculine energy.

From a very young age we are orientated towards the masculine. In school we compete against the other for placements and awards. We are focused on expanding our intellect and/or skills to earn money, status and power. We believe we need to be productive to be valued and contributing members of society.

Meanwhile we are at odds with the feminine. We either believe that it she is the feebler of the two, inefficient, and unnecessary, or we’’re unsure of what the feminine really is. We are disconnected from our feminine and in turn ourselves because feeling and expressing our emotions is seen as a sign of weakness or being overly dramatic. Pleasure is a selfish and embarrassing pursuit, spurned in favour of productivity. And critical occupations in child and aged care, allied health, nursing, and the performing and creative arts are under appreciated and well underpaid. Not to mention the loss of connection we have with Mother Nature (the manifestation of the feminine) on whom are very survival is dependent.

Masculine energy is not a bad thing. The Go energy has brought rapid and huge shifts and transformation to the world, it is what “gets shit done”. It holds space, orientates, and provides direction and goals. It is absolutely necessary and valuable.

But too much of this and we end up burnt-out, dried up, and in a constant blur of doing all.the.things that our hearts are not really in, leaving no outlet for our creativity. We compete against each other instead of collaborate. We live in our heads totally numb to what our bodies are screaming at us. And of course, our relationships suffer, for when both people in the party are embodying the masculine there are more irritable bumps rather than rubs, of shoulders. For without the opposing tension of the healthy feminine there is no possibility for sacred union.

However, as you read know that the aim is not to have you living in your feminine dimension alone, rather it’s to achieve greater harmony and arrive at the perfect balance that works for you.

By reflecting on how we currently engage our feminine or masculine energies in different aspects of our lives we may reach some ah-ha’s! on why things are panning out the way they are, and with the heightened perspective identify opportunities to harness the full energetic spectrum that is available to us.

The duality of feminine and masculine is available to all of us throughout our daily life.

What is your masculine/feminine balance?

Consider all aspects of your life, how you run your home, your approach to health, family, career, wealth, spirituality, how you exercise, plan and eat meals, how you engage socially, and your relationships. How do you approach all of these aspects?

Is it with GO, focus, making plans and taking the next steps, keeping up momentum, relying on your own judgement and opinions?

Or is it with FLOW, emotionally connecting with others, listening to your body and prioritising your needs first, reflecting on the bigger picture with trust that things will come together?

Ask yourself in what parts of your life:

·        Do you find space to express beauty?

·        Do you feel safe and happy to surrender and just go with the flow?

·        Are you well organised, with lists and plans?

·        Can focus and get ‘’shit done”?

·        Do you take the lead, but would prefer not to?

·        Do you sit in chaos and emotions, wanting and waiting for someone to take charge for you?

There is no right or wrong answer to any of these questions.

Instead let them guide you to understand where you are on the spectrum of feminine flow and masculine go. Perhaps you can see an imbalance? Perhaps you can see opportunities for some re-alignment?

Ask yourself, what aspects of your life would you like to embrace more “go”? And what aspects of your life would you like to embrace more “flow” energy?

Now that you’ve taken stock of your energy ratio try experimenting with different scenarios and introducing the opposite energy in.

Notice what improves when you are in your feminine energy? My guess is that with just this taster you will find countless opportunities to harness MORE of you.

How do I embody my feminine energy?

First, clear any misunderstandings about the feminine.

She is not weak nor unnecessary. Far from it. She is intuition, wisdom, compassion, connection, fluid yet strong. She is Mother Nature manifest, in all her winding rivers, raging waterfalls, burning deserts, bursts of flora and fauna, and the unwavering readiness to die, only to rise stronger, wiser, brighter from the ashes.

Consider any limiting beliefs or truths you hold about being a woman. What do you believe a woman should be? What should a woman look like? Being a woman means…? Look at what trauma, behavioural patterns, or beliefs you may have inherited from your Mother - your first feminine role model. Look deep.

Engage embodiment as a practice.

We spend so much time in the GO that we need to practice and re-learn the skills that can create fluidity between the masculine and feminine FLOW aspect of ourselves.

The masculine energy of doing, directing, focus, and discipline is up in our heads and requires a certain rigidity and disposition in our bodies. To unlock the flow we need to move down from our heads into our bodies. When we reconnect with our body we find the source of our awareness. For it is through our bodies that we experience all experiences. Your portals to your body include awareness, breath, sound, and movement.

• Take a moment to be still and grounded. Send your breath into your heart space, and then your womb space. Warming them and noticing what is there.

• Take up a non-linear movement practice, not yoga, not choreographed dance, just free-flow movement that your body is asking for.

• Start paying attention to the internal felt textures and sensations that make up your feelings, feel these subtle energies that are always coursing through you, get to know them.

• Sing, shout, make guttural noises. Express!

• Garden, with your hands pushed deep into the damp soil.

• Enjoy mindful slow moments in nature, at one with her,

• Open up your energetic space and soften it to receive, rather than pushing your energy forward.

• Ask yourself, what does my body need? And listen to her.

This connection to your body and your sensitivity to how she feels is your path to accessing your feminine.

The coursing internal felt senses that are alive in your body at all times will become once again your source of pleasure, your source of wisdom. When we tap into this we unlock the full and flowing range of expression that available to us. This is why embodiment work is so critical.

As we shift from prioritising the head to the heart we learn to go deep before we go forward. We tap into the very essence of our human nature, of love.

This is what the rising feminine is about. The feminine will not supersede the masculine, but level up to unite with him.

We need to make room for both.

To reference the words of my teacher Jenna Ward:

‘The universal feminine/masculine reminds us there is beauty in the balance. The striving forward and penetrating the world with purpose means little if it's not married with the depth of love, radiance and beauty of the feminine. It is through the harmonious existence of these aspects of character than one may perhaps find balance, meaning and deeper inhabiting of self.’