Your cycle, period or no
Harnessing your feminine cycle, whether you get your period or not.
I’ve seen and read a lot recently on women syncing our cycles to our work and social calendar, in effect enabling us to maximise on the emotional uplift that you will feel during ovulation, and enabling the space and slowness required to turn inward and nurture ourselves when we are bleeding. Menstruation is a sacred phenomenon particular to females, providing us with the ability to release and renew every single month. I’m an ardent supporter of tuning to the cyclical ebb and flow of nature, and our own female bodies, bringing a deeper awareness to our energetic shifts and harnessing the superpowers that lie in each.
Honouring my own internal rhythm has been a healing, cathartic, and fun way to reconnect with my body, creative force, and with nature. Now practicing to tune into my body I’ve been more able to access my creativity and intuition, and experience true self-awareness.
But I haven’t had a period in years.
I promise you it’s not the contradiction you may think it is.
Like many of you I went on the contraceptive pill when I was about 16, before I understood or appreciated the magic of menstruation. I thought of myself as linear, rather than cyclical, in that I was either bleeding or not. I didn’t understand that our female cycles are complex and that our body, mood, metabolism and hormones fluctuate throughout the month. I certainly didn’t understand what the pill did to my body, I just continued taking it because I liked the convenience of not having to deal with the massive inconvenience of bleeding, especially as I navigated my way through sports, relationships, and travel in my late teens and early twenties.
I realised on hindsight that the pill had taken my hormones offline, I felt numb and detached from myself. So I went off the pill cold-turkey and in one foul swoop I broke up with a long-term boyfriend, quit my new professional job, and moved overseas without much of a plan. I didn’t get my period back for YEARS. I didn’t even think anything of it, as I perceived in its absence it was still providing me the freedom that I wanted.
Gradually in my mid 20’s my period came back irregularly in fits and starts, I’d be joyous when it would return for a month or two, only for it to disappear for six. I was living in a developing country without access to healthcare and I so I just rode it out. It was by no small miracle that I fell pregnant with my little girl. Of course being pregnant meant no more periods for 10 months, and 19 months after birth I still regularly breastfeed and my period has STILL not returned.
Why am I telling you this?
Because you can still honour and benefit from all of the same gifts our cycles offer even if you are not bleeding.
Things may feel different may be a bit diluted, or could feel slightly more challenging to decipher, particularly if you are taking synthetic hormones. But you can still tap into nature’s wisdom.
There are a myriad of reasons why you may not menstruate:
· High stress
· Pregnancy or postpartum
· Breastfeeding (you can still ovulate which you are breastfeeding, but you may not bleed)
· Hormonal imbalances apparent in PCOS or endometritis
· Hormonal Birth Control
· Low body weight
· Menopause/ post-menopause
· If you do not have a womb
If you are breastfeeding like me, the time range of “normal” for the return of your period is enormous. Some women resume their menstrual cycles soon after giving birth, while others do not resume menstruating until your baby is off the boob (which can be months or years later, depending on how long the baby is nursed). This depends on how sensitive the mother’s body is, and how frequently the baby nurses. Most breastfeeding mothers will resume their periods between 9 and 18 months after their baby’s birth (I still haven’t). Weaning will apparently almost certainly cause a resumption in your menstrual cycle, but for most women it is not a necessary condition, just a way to accelerate the process - stay tuned on this one as I have begun a very gentle approach to weaning Anya.
Can I chart, understand and honour my cycle even if I don’t actually menstruate?
While doing a lot of deep inner transformative work on myself in the last few years I deeply mourned the loss of this regular reminder of my femininity, my fertility, and the tune-in it provided. However I have come full circle, and increasingly I have realised that I can still live in sync with my body and it’s seasons and there is no reason why you cannot too.
HOW TO SYNC-IN WITHOUT A PERIOD:
To develop an understanding of your own unique rhythm the easiest and most effective way is to take note. I have found the following steps to be helpful:
Appreciate that we are cyclical beings.
Firstly, understanding that your body goes through the same four seasons (see below) that mother nature does. I love knowing how deeply connected to and in tune women are with nature, and that each internal season presents its own way for my body to flourish. The 4 inner seasons directly correlate with the hormones in our body. At each stage a woman’s brain and body is very different thus everything about her will be very different depending on where she is at in her cycle; her mood, her focus, her abilities, her communication, her energy, even her self-esteem.
Talk to your womb.
Find time to be still daily and tune into yourself and your womb space. I place a hand over my lower belly and ask myself how I’m feeling physically, emotionally, mentally, & spiritually. I focus on my health, my mood, my productivity, peaks of energy & lethargy, relationship dynamics, and level of self-appreciation.
Journal and track.
Taking notes in a journal has helped me track where I am within the month. As you start noting the troughs and peaks each day, it’ll become easier to spot the seasons and get to know what your hormonal winter, spring, summer and autumn feel like.
Tune in and honour.
I listen to my body and honour it according to the season. I recommend taking a look at your calendar and pinpointing when your winter is likely to start, try colour coding each phase, then map out your month based on when you will likely need rest, or when you will likely be more active. You’ll find yourself feeling way more nourished and aligned in life.
The seasons
Note that the days and duration of each cycle is completely individual, these are but a guide. Listen to yourself first.
Winter. Days 1-7. Normally when you would bleed. Your energy tends to be lower than at any other time in the month as your key sex hormones are lowest at this time of your cycle. This is a time for rest, hibernation and integrating the month that has just passed. For me not a lot gets done, but I do feel much more intuitive. I set intentions for the month ahead, but I am gentle on myself and I go slow.
Spring. Days 7-14. When you feel a lift in spirits and energy. This is the Follicular phase when your pituitary gland releases a hormone called Follicle Stimulating Hormone (FSH) preparing for the release of eggs. Your estrogen and testosterone levels remain low at the beginning but gradually increase as ovulation gets closer, they boost your energy, mood and brain skills. You start to feel more confident, powerful and are willing to take more risks. Now is the time for planning, new ideas, organising and spring cleaning.
Summer: Normally ovulation. Days 14-21. This is usually when our energy levels and extroversion peak. I feel like Wonderwoman, I’m keen to socialise, I can get a lot done, and I feel great in myself. Estrogen and Testosterone are rising to their to peak levels, boosting all of the effects you enjoyed during the Spring follicular phase – you actually look more attractive during this time and you’ll feel more confident about your appearance.
Autumn: The last 7 days. I find I’m increasingly less inclined to be sociable, I get cravings and I start to feel cranky-tired. This is the luteal phase when estrogen and testosterone gradually decline and progesterone production increases. Particularly towards the end my emotions build up and tend to be released in so called PMS-like behaviour. I tend to judge myself more harshly and have doubts and anxieties about my business. For me it is a great time practice some nurturing self-care, good foods, more sleep, reading. Workwise it’s a good idea to attend to more detailed oriented tasks, like book-keeping and accounting.
For more information The Red School is a brilliant resource on cycle tracking, or for a funny quick TedX talk check out Lucy Peach at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2c17e5naow.
I find the internal rhythm and cycles of women fascinating and mysterious and I think there is so much more to understand and appreciate. It doesn’t matter if you bleed or not, listen to your body and take the opportunity it provides for restorative time-out each month instead of following the linear model of constant productivity which just doesn’t suit us women.
Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, so please ensure that if you have any doubts about your health, hormones or menstruation that you seek professional advice. Nobody knows your body as well as you do! While there have been many positives for women for many years using hormonal contraception, it is also well known for causing a lot of issues and negative side effects. It is important to trust in your womb, ask yourself the question- “is what I am doing/using working for me?”.
If you don’t have your period back yet after pregnancy follow along as I keep you updated on my journey.