Could you choose pleasure over productivity?
Are you chasing the clock?
Busy convincing others just how busy you are? Feel a surge of shame rise up over having an empty day?
Life doesn’t need to look like the 9-5 hustle that mandates you steam through a to-do list. That has you go, “oh I’d love to, but I’m just so busy”.
I’ve been there. Ramming a schedule full. Getting a high from striking another thing off the to-list. Working into the early hours only to rise and work some more, focused on how much I could achieve in the day. What else could I fit in?!
It was nearly addictive, as I’d feel so satisfied after a busy day, I’d be ready to do it all again to get the surge of self-congratulatory endorphins fill my system.
It’s all too easy to get sucked into this narrative.
The link between accomplishments = self-worth is embedded in us from an early age.
We are told that productivity and hard work equals success. That rest, leisure, and pleasure won’t get you anywhere except into a pool of lazy entitlement. That busy is best.
We have been fed a lie.
This mentality serves the patriarchy, not you. By effectively linking your self-worth to how much you achieve we end up serving the beast that created this culture in the first place, not ourselves.
Instead of asking ourselves what else we could do, could we instead ask ourselves, “What would pleasure have me do?”.
“What would pleasure have me do?”
Have you ever stopped and asked yourself this question? Does it seem absurd? Radical? Or perhaps revolutionary?
It is unequivocally obvious that pleasure is not a priority in this world. Pleasure (and let’s add in rest for good measure) is often kept for those rare moments on the weekend, or at the end of the day once all the tasks and chores are done.
But why?! - Have you ever questioned why?
All things in balance: Masculine and Feminine
The masculine says “Let’s go, keep moving forward, let’s achieve and reach our goals. Do. Then do more”
The feminine says, “Mmmmm but what of now, of life, of joy and pleasure?”
The masculine has served us well, for technological advancements, for structure, for order and the bright promise of the future. But it has become so overly represented in our patriarchal culture and the qualities of the feminine have been suppressed and we’ve forgotten that life is not all about being busy, about linear forward momentum, about work and success.
The feminine invites us to engage fully in those moments to soak in the sun, make eye contact with a loved one, or sink into the sensation of being ‘just because’. Those moments in life that you wish to bottle because they make your heart swell to bursting point and all becomes right in the world.
And THIS is where we find that pleasure is powerful.
The feminine asks you to engage pleasurably in all things, because this is your birth right, this is your very way of being, this is where you feel into your magic, and this is when you become expansive and free.
When you are in this place, ANYTHING is possible.
This is not (necessarily!) an invitation to throw everything away in favour of languid, feeling, flowing-ness in every waking hour. For life continues, there is a business to run, projects to complete, clients and customers to engage with, a house to look after and families to raise.
Do these things, have your goals and passions and create the structure and systems to effectively pursue them. But…
Prioritise pleasure.
Pleasure first, productivity second.
Your body is designed for pleasure, it is when you are most alive, most fuelled, most creative, most connected to your source - if honour this you can harness it to bring more to your life.
As a bonus, in making more time for pleasure, you will find more spaciousness for the doing. You will find that in allowing those moments for joy and rest you increase your capacity for what life throws at you, and your productivity. But I want to say that this is not the aim of pleasure, but rather a delicious side effect. There is a difference to ‘using’ pleasure as a gateway to achieve an outcome, versus simply imbibing in pleasure for the sheer sake of it.
Please, imbibe in pleasure for the sheer sake of it. For DELIGHT. For life.
A woman in rapturous joy and pleasure with all things around her is a miracle in this world and a gift to all of us.
So I invite you to ask yourself this question today, and every day following,
“What would pleasure have me do?”
And honour it.
What brings you pleasure, what fills you up, what has you fully inhabit your body and experience the sensations of life rippling through you is unique to you. Pleasure does not look, sound, or feel a certain way (despite what we may have been told).
Some ideas to spark you:
picking some flowers, breathing in their scent and beauty and placing them ritualistically on your desk
lighting a candle and pausing in the moment
feel the sun warm your body
soft slow body caresses
undulating your hips and spine while at the desk
free-flow impromptu dance
lying on the grass and feeling the sun fill your body with warmth
draping luxurious fabrics over your skin
It’s simple really, ask yourself what pleasure would have you do - the first thing in the day… and honour it. Prioritise it, make time in your calendar, notice the gifts that it brings to your body and your energy, and then let the rest of the day unfold as it normally would.
I would love to know what pleasurable thing you prioritise today, comment below and spread the juiciness around!